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An Example from the Book: The Match
If you are a good mime, as most Midwesterners are, you can apply this action to numerous activities. The application that sticks out most prominently would be to mime the lighting of a cigarette. Then you are cool for smoking, flipping someone off, and blowing smoke out of your mouth all in good miming style. You will be the hat trick of hip.
Instructions: (1) Strike your fist across your other palm and (2) immediately extend your bird. If it doesn't work the first time, repeat the first step until it lights. (3) Hold it up to show the recipient. (4) Light your cigarette. (5) Blow on your bird and (6) retract.
Tip: If you are really ready to party, use the Match to light a bong: (1) Place thumbkin's nail from your other hand on your lips (2) with your bird fully extended. (3) Bring the Match to your bong bird and suck in while making gurgley sounds. After you have taken a full hit, (4) hold your breath, (5) blow the Match out, and (6) in your best Jeff Spicoli - like surfer-dude voice say, "Fuck you . . . dude."
If a lighter is more your style, here's a variation for you: (1) Make a fist (2) with thumbkin sticking straight up into the air. (3) Strike it several times across your pointer finger. With the last strike (4) extend your bird, then go about your business of lighting a bong or cigarette. Do not use this variation if you are lighting a cigar; purists believe the butane does not mix well with a Connecticut shade wrapper.
Difficulty: 1 Impact: 3 Specialty: 3
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